The Blancing Act

Balancing the good with the bad a scale that never seems to  even out no matter how hard you try.  Its like trying to tune a guitar with a warped neck right when you think your getting close and you wind the last string tighter it throws all the other strings out of whack.  Is playing with five strings in tune good enough while learning to adjust and figure out how the hell to make the fucked up sixth string work by cheating and bending the shit out of it?  Or do you just go out and buy a whole new guitar or risk fucking things up further by trying to adjust the warped neck yourself?  As I sit here clearing my mind on yet another blank page that is already full of self analysis trying to figure out if I'm doing the work of cleaning out my mind myself or if its just talking about it to a complete stranger that is what is helping.  With stores full of self help books I realize there are alot of people out there that are at least a little fucked up if not more so than me.  Thing is do we actually have the ability and tools to fix ourselves.  I know one thing being angry and pisses is very draining like a sickness only it feeds on you like a vampire one taste of the virgins blood and we need more.  Is there such a thing as a happy artist or is our pain our own self made drive for creation?  Do more people relate to a song about happiness or a song about the pain of living?  Is the  pain the driving force of our existence hoping that one day things will magically get better.  It would be interesting to count the actual number of fantastic almost magical days the we actually have in our lifetime I can fucking guarantee that they are in no way anywhere near the number of fucked up shitty days that we get to become acquainted with.